Recently I was directing my youth in a run-through of their Youth Sunday worship service. This was a full rehearsal so that we could work out the rubics, troubleshoot AV issues, and make sure every aspect of the service pointed back to the youth-chosen theme. Several times I was asked – since there were all-important lock-in games like Sardines and Mafia to get to – “Do I have to read my whole part? I know what I’m supposed to do.” And each time I replied, “Practice like you play.” (I guess that old desire to coach basketball still lurks in the back of my brain.)

There are some worship leaders who think that writing out liturgy and sermon manuscripts (if that suits your preaching style) and rehearsing worship prevents the Holy Spirit from moving in the moment. But I believe that good preparation is a sign that a worship leader takes seriously his/her responsibility to God and to the gathered body. It’s a mark of hospitality when a worship leader ensures important details are highlighted and good transitions are made, because otherwise visitors won’t know what to expect. Preparation and rehearsal also create muscle memory in a worship leader so that if he/she is having an off day, the advance work can fill in some gaps.

But perhaps most importantly – and ironically – practicing creates more space for the Holy Spirit to operate. The Spirit isn’t limited to influencing the worship hour but instead can guide all the planning, study, writing, rehearsing, physical space arranging, and recruiting of liturgists, musicians, and greeters.

Practice like you play…and invite the Holy Spirit to redirect you in the moment and to translate all that happens into the message(s) the people in the pews need to hear.

No one – well, no healthy person – loves conflict. But since we are neither clones nor automatons, conflict happens.

Actually, I’ll take it a step further. We need conflict to grow as individuals and as communities. That tension prompts us to reflect on and clarify what we’re passionate about and why. It (ideally) makes us more carefully consider our positions and interactions and keeps us engaged with those who believe differently than we do. Conflict also shakes us out of complacency by spicing things up.

But conflict is still uncomfortable and potentially destructive if it’s not managed well. Here are some questions to ponder when dealing with conflict in a ministry setting:

What is really driving the conflict? Often the presenting issue is not the real issue.

What does your role need to be in managing the conflict? Know where your involvement should begin and end. Don’t enable others’ bad behavior by stepping in out of your own anxiety.

How can the passions at play be redirected? Apathy is a much bigger problem than conflict. So what are some positive outlets for the care being shown?

What culture changes need to occur so that future conflict is productive? Be proactive about teaching your people how to fight well. It will be worth your effort!

The endgame is not to eliminate conflict but to do conflict well. If you know people or churches who model this, find out what their conflict hacks are and try them on for size.

Resilience is perhaps the most underrated but necessary trait of a pastoral leader. Think about it. We’re supposed to shepherd our people as the world becomes both more connected and fractious, as expectations for clergy grow but respect for ministers ebbs, and as the bar for “active” church involvement keeps getting lowered. Resilience is what keeps us plugging along in the name of Christ when we’d rather binge-watch Netflix and eat our feelings.

An article from Faith & Leadership describes resilience as “a kind of lived hope, a way to keep getting up again that has its roots in God’s permanent faithfulness” (C. Kavin Rowe, “Cultivating resilience in Christ-shaped leaders,” 4/23/12). It is not synonymous with toughness, which often results in bottling up our feelings and cutting ourselves off from others. It is also not a denial of difficulty. Instead, resilience is a recognition that God is at always at work, bringing us ever closer in ways that are both now and not yet realities.

So what prompts greater resilience? Consider these questions:

• What does resilience look like for you?

• What do you need to let go of to become more resilient?

• What resources do you need – skills, support, etc. – to be more resilient? Where do you find these resources?

• How do you point others toward resilience, since resilience is a community endeavor?

When we are more resilient, we are healthier emotionally, spiritually, and physically. We are also more able to tell and hear truth, making relationships stronger and congregations more prepared and eager to engage with the world beyond the parking lot.

One of my son’s favorite books is Mousetronaut: Based on a (Partially) True Story by Astronaut Mark Kelly. It is the story of Meteor, a diminutive mouse chosen for a spot on the space shuttle based on his hard work and confidence. Meteor is happy to be along for the ride, but he’s not sure what his role in the mission is supposed to be. When the key to the control panel drops into a crevice unreachable by the astronauts, though, Meteor uses his size to squeeze into the space and dislodge the key. For his efforts Meteor is heralded as a mousetronaut, and he relishes this new identity and proudly proclaims the power of small.

There’s a lot of focus on size in church life. How many people are in the pews on Sunday mornings? How big is the offering? These questions come internally when corporate self-esteem is based on nickels and noses or when the membership has reason to wonder if God has left the building. They also come from outside sources, such as judicatories that ask churches to keep score of professions of faith, membership transfers, and the exact number of sweet peas donated to the food bank each year.

This numbers emphasis could mislead us to believe that there is something wrong with small churches. Yes, congregations can remain small because they are cliquish or uninterested in discipleship and mission. But sometimes churches are small because that is the size they need to be to fulfill the task God has for them. A 75-member congregation can’t offer all the life groups, children’s programming, or worship time choices that a megachurch can. But it can throw open its doors to the community with less red tape, welcome people looking for a faith community without the intimidation factor, and build lasting relationships with service organizations since lay leader turnover is less frequent.

Sometimes impact is inversely proportional to size. If your church has earnestly discerned the mission God has for it and that assignment lends itself to a smaller membership, wear your corporate identity with pride. The goal, after all, is not nickels and noses. It’s going forth to share the love of God with people who need to hear it.

As the NCAA tournament has played out the past few weeks, I’ve spent some time reflecting on what makes a good teammate. Ministry is a vocation that can lend itself to Lone Rangerdom, but it bears the longest-lasting fruit when it is done collaboratively. (Hey, even God needs three aspects working together to get the job done.) Whether you are part of a big staff or a solo pastor who recruits laypeople for some of the tasks covered by ordained ministers in larger churches, the following observations apply.

Good teammates:

Cooperate. This seems obvious, but it doesn’t always happen.

Coordinate. The most effective ministry requires some measure of advance planning – together – not just in our individual areas of responsibility.

Communicate. Learning teammates’ verbal and non-verbal cues cuts down on costly misunderstandings and allows the team to roll more easily with the unexpected.

Practice and play hard. The whole team looks good when everyone has prepared. On the other hand, one person’s lack of preparedness can make the whole team look like it hasn’t taken the task at hand seriously.

Share credit. Spread the word about how others contributed to a good outcome. Your teammates will become more deeply invested in your relationship and in your shared mission.

Encourage one another. We all get down. And when we get down, we rarely do our best ministry.

Know how and when to confront one another… Teams run into personality conflicts and differences of opinion. Don’t let them fester.

…but also maintain a unified front. Nothing tears a team apart faster than teammates talking behind one another’s backs.

Being a teammate is about working with others toward a common goal and making those around us better. And there are few things as exhilarating and productive as being part of a team that has really gelled.

Let’s be honest. Clergy cannot live on pulpit supply honoraria alone. Even in judicatories that dictate generous minimums, the return on a guest minister’s investment of time usually works out to less than minimum wage. (Don’t do the math. Just…don’t.)

But, pulpit supply pays other dividends that could be even more valuable than cold, hard cash.

Do you need to get your name out because you’re between positions? Do you have a new freelance ministry that could be advertised in your guest minister bio? Guest preaching, done well, can raise your profile and give you good word-of-mouth buzz.

Do you love learning how other congregations or denominations worship? Guest preaching provides you the opportunity to try on someone else’s way of doing things.

Do you enjoy meeting new people and traveling to new places? Guest preaching allows you to encounter folks and visit towns you wouldn’t otherwise.

Do you want to learn more about how to and how not to treat guests, whether clergy or laity? Guest preaching gives you a glimpse into others’ hospitality practices.

Best of all, though, guest preaching gives you a forum to tell the Good News and fulfill part of your call in the process.

If you’re wondering how to fill the pulpit without losing your mind, check out some tips here.

Recently I added my take on being half of a clergy couple to the online series #Yoked. (Thank you to Mihee Kim-Kort for the chance to write!) While my main intention was to provide a peek inside one dual ministry marriage, I also hoped to articulate some on-the-job gleanings that have shaped my vocational life:

It can take a while to settle into a ministry groove. This is partly true in my case because I had to learn how to apply seminary knowledge in the Real World. More than that, though, it took time to grow into the clothes of a pastor.

Calls to ministry evolve over time. When I started looking for my first ministry position, I had a clear idea of what my professional trajectory would be. God laughed, then shredded my map. Thank goodness, because this winding journey has been much more fulfilling.

One bad experience doesn’t have to be the end of the vocational line. I still feel the sting when I think about my stint in a toxic setting. But the pain crystallized my purpose and fired me up for what I do now.

Pre-fab positions aren’t the only ministry outlets. I finally figured out I could be creative within my constraints. At times I have pieced together different ministry jobs to equal full-time work. At others I have accepted positions that were likely created with someone else in mind. (Most interim minister job descriptions are not written to draw young, female candidates!) And now I have started my own sideline, which may someday be my main ministry.

Ministry can’t be done well – at least for long – in isolation. I have my wonderful husband, who understands the joys and challenges of being a pastor. But I also have a network of local partners in ministry and an international community of young clergy women who teach and support me on a daily basis.

I hope my still-unfolding story is an encouragement to you, especially if you are a current or future minister wondering if this crazy, beautiful vocational life is for you. The church needs you!

Ah, the first semester of seminary. That magical time when I formed my still-strong circle of friends, I finally heard women preach (from the pulpit, and their messages were called sermons rather than “talks”), and people in authority really wanted me to ask my many questions about the Church and the Bible.

My world was rapidly expanding. And I was introduced to an image in my History of Christian Thought class that helped me make sense of it. This image still serves as the lens through which I interpret my ministry, politics, and personal relationships:

“Suppose we were to take a compass and insert the point and draw the outline of a circle. The center point is the same distance from any point on the circumference. Let us suppose that this circle is the world and that God himself is the center….To move toward God, then, human beings move from the circumference along the various radii of the circle to the center…The closer they are to God, the closer they become to one another; and the closer they are to one another, the closer they become to God.” (Sixth-century monk Dorotheos of Gaza, quoted on p. 25 of To Love As God Loves by Roberta Bondi)

As a visual person, I realized I needed an artistic representation of this picture in words both to tell other people what my ministry is about and to keep me inspired. There was no question where I would turn for this rendering – Silver Tree Art, a ministry provided by my friend Suzanne L. Vinson. Suzanne took the Dorotheos quote and used watercolors and ink to interpret it. I love her creation, which includes leaves, hearts, arrows, and an equal sign along the radii. I hope and trust you will appreciate it as well, because I will be using it every chance I get!

I am an unabashed fan of tv. I relish the evenings when my husband and I can veg in front of our big (medium?) screen, using our favorite shows as springboards for conversation about the events of the day, politics, or vacation plans

That said, I don’t deal well with series finales. I get attached to characters and to the routine of checking in with them weekly. My chest tightens a little at the thought of only being able to visit them in syndication, a time warp where no new plot lines unfold. Last week’s Parks and Recreation swan song was about as good as a finale gets, though. It gave viewers a heartwarming glimpse into the futures of the characters. Each of the flash forwards reunited the Parks Department team and showed them supporting one another through successes, challenges, and milestones, even though many of them had moved on not just from city government but also from Pawnee.

Who wouldn’t want friends like that? Friends who fly in to share the big moments, who work to maintain a bond that was once a matter of proximity but now takes great effort, who love and deeply respect us in spite of – or sometimes because of – significant differences? In clergydom, however, such friends are hard to find if you don’t already have them from your pre-ministry years. And once you’re living the ever on-call life, it’s tough to tend the friendships you do have. (Believe me, I know.

Soul friendships can’t be forced, of course. But I wonder if coaching can pose awareness-raising questions and offer accountability to people who are looking for life-giving relationships that don’t depend on a mutual love for all things clerical. What makes a true friend? Where might you meet someone who fits the bill? When will you go there? How will you initiate a relationship? How will you know if this is a friendship worth pursuing? How will you cultivate the bond?

It’s hard to step out and make a new friend. But ministry is too hard a road to travel alone.

Lent is the season for spiritual spring cleaning. As we journey to the foot of the cross, we shed (with God’s help) the things that keep us from being closer to God and to one another. On Easter we celebrate the redemption of our lives together in Christ.

It is important to engage in spiritual disciplines that help us acknowledge and remove barriers to bonds on a personal level. But I think it’s just as critical to discern relationship distractions and oversights on a communal level. Where do we particularly need help as a church so that we can fully join with other parts of Christ’s body in carrying out God’s call? This calendar contains a season full of prayer prompts to orient congregations toward renewed cohesiveness, health, and missional focus. A grayscale PDF is available here.

As a brainy, uncoordinated child I had little use for sports. In the sixth grade, though, my best friend introduced me to basketball, and it was love at first bounce. I played a year of rec ball, during which I had to shoot my free throws granny-style because my spindly arms weren’t used to such physical exertion. I played two years on my school team, improving my shooting and becoming a tenacious defender. I was an anxious ball-handler, though, and ball management is a big part of the job description when you’re 4’10.” I decided I was a better student of the game than player, and I spent my high school years keeping statistics for the team and filing the occasional scouting report about an upcoming opponent. I loved every moment in that role, and I set my sights on becoming a basketball coach. I read basketball theory and biographies of great coaches and used all of my tv time during the season to break down games. When I graduated from high school, my coach gave me the whiteboard he used to diagram plays for the team and his well wishes for my coaching journey.

Needless to say, this coaching journey took a turn. God got tired of whispering in my ear about a call to ministry and started yelling and banging pots and pans. I stored the whiteboard in the attic and turned my attention to scripture, history, polity, classical languages, and psychology. I went to seminary. I began ministering in congregations, hospitals, and domestic violence shelters. I was never sorry that Pat Summitt didn’t have to watch over her shoulder for me. But in 2010 I was introduced to the concept of ministry coaching and contracted with a seasoned minister who asked questions that brought out the best in me. I was soon more effective, more joyful, more confident as a minister. And when I was offered the opportunity to become a coach myself, I jumped at it.

Ministry coaching isn’t quite like basketball coaching. I do much more listening and asking than yelling and telling. But I love every moment in this role too, and it is a privilege to walk alongside coachees as they build on their fundamentals and discover their own tenacity.